Lightning Fill In The Blank

Sep 22, 2018
Originally published on September 22, 2018 11:06 am
Copyright 2018 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game - Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is worth two points.

Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Tara and Faith each have 3, Adam has 2.

SAGAL: OK. Adam, you're in third place. You're up first. Fill in the blank. On Monday, China announced $60 billion of new blank on U.S. goods.

ADAM BURKE: Tariffs.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ABC News reported that Trump's former lawyer Michael Cohen has spent hours talking with blank's team over the past month.

BURKE: Robert Mueller.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Residents in Massachusetts filed suit against gas company NiSource after a string of blanks destroyed several houses last week.

BURKE: Spills - oil spills.

SAGAL: No, gas explosions. According to a nationwide Harris Poll, blank is the best Mexican restaurant in the country.

BURKE: (Laughter) Is it, like, Taco Bell?

SAGAL: It is.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, the CEO of Chinese retail giant blank backed out of his pledge to create a million new jobs in America.

BURKE: Pass.

SAGAL: Alibaba is the name of the company. On Sunday, Kenyan runner Eliud Kipchog set a new world record after completing the Berlin blank in just over two hours.

BURKE: Marathon.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Washington state had to arrest a woman...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...After she refused to pull over and told officers blank.

BURKE: (Laughter) She was a cop, and they were the criminal.

SAGAL: No, she said I drive a Prius. I'm not pulling over.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: When the officer tried to pull her over, she just kept going and told him I drive a Prius, I'm not pulling over.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The officer then told her she was under arrest for refusing to follow orders to which she responded I will own your bank account. I will own your home. Troopers then informed her she didn't need to go all this extra trouble to be obnoxious. She was already driving a Prius.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Adam do?

KURTIS: Well, he got four right, eight more points, a total of 10, and he's in the lead.

SAGAL: All right. We have flipped a coin, and Tara has elected to go next. So please fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the Senate approved a new spending bill successfully avoiding blank.

TARA CLANCY: I don't know.

SAGAL: A government shutdown. On Monday. President, Trump ordered that some documents related to the blank investigation be declassified.

CLANCY: Russia.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo said that the denuclearization talks with blank were back on.

CLANCY: North Korea.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, blank announced they're planning to open 3,000 more cashier-less convenience stores by 2021.

CLANCY: Target.

SAGAL: Amazon.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A man at Yellowstone Park was criticized by fellow visitors after he was spotted blanking.

CLANCY: Peeing.

SAGAL: Into Old Faithful, yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the Japanese government's attempt to overturn a decades-old global ban on commercial blanking failed by a wide margin.

CLANCY: No idea.

SAGAL: Whaling. A report released this week found that blank conspired with scalpers to artificially inflate ticket prices.

CLANCY: Ticketmaster.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the town of Uranium, Mo., celebrated...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...The launch of a new local paper called The Blank.

CLANCY: Uranus.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Too easy. It was called The Uranus Examiner.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The new weekly paper covers stories throughout Pulaski County. It was not supported by everybody in the town, but the mayor saying that the Uranus Examiner, quote, "puts the city up for public ridicule." This is somewhat ironic considering that the town's own tourism page boasts - and this is completely true - that there's plenty to do in and around Uranus.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Tara do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Four right, eight more points, a total of 11, one ahead of Adam, and she's in the lead.

SAGAL: All right, so then how many does Faith need to win and be once again above average?

(LAUGHTER)

KURTIS: Only five is needed.

SAGAL: Only five. Here we go, Faith. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, President Trump once again criticized blank, saying I don't have an attorney general.

FAITH SALIE: Oh, Jeff Sessions.

SAGAL: Yes.

SALIE: Sessions.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, President Trump was praised as a strong leader who respects the rule of law by blank.

SALIE: The Polish president.

SAGAL: By Jeff Sessions.

SALIE: Oh.

SAGAL: This week, the Air Force released a report estimating that Trump's proposed blank would cost $13 billion over five years.

SALIE: Oh, his Space Force.

SAGAL: Space Force.

SALIE: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, two more people were reported ill on the English town of Salisbury where a former Russian blank was poisoned.

SALIE: A former Russian spy.

SAGAL: Right. A Florida man accused of doing lawn work and car repairs in the nude has refused to speak to reporters, saying that he's blank.

SALIE: He is...

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: He talks to nature and not people.

SAGAL: No, he won't talk to them because he says, quote - he's, quote, "a very private person."

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: Of course.

SAGAL: This week, it was announced that Cary Fukunaga would direct the next installment of the long-running blank franchise.

SALIE: "James Bond."

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel" and "Game Of Thrones" were the big winners at this year's blank awards.

SALIE: Emmys.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, an all-you-can-eat sushi restaurant in Germany...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Banned a triathlete after he blanked.

SALIE: Ate all he could eat.

SAGAL: Exactly. He ate too much sushi. First of all, I know what you're thinking. All-you-can-eat German sushi - get me on a plane.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But before you go to Bavaria to eat your weight in sauerkraut sashimi, know that the restaurant recently banned an Iron Man triathlete after he paid his $15 flat fee and then ate 100 plates of sushi. The man said he ate all the food as part of his training regimen for the three disciplines of the triathlon - salmonella, listeria and mercury poisoning.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Faith do well enough to win?

KURTIS: She got six right, 12 more points - a total of 15 gives her the win.

SAGAL: Congratulations. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.